Sigh...it seems like there are always great periods of time between one post and another, which is completely and utterly unacceptable considering the frequency with which I log on to facebook in order to harvest imaginary fruits, flowers and vegetables on Farmville. Blech. Although I *have* "downsized" by planting crops that take several days to "ripen" as opposed to each day. A woman's got to prioritize, after all.
Anyway, I can honestly say that several times each day I think about this blog, thinking about little tidbits and moments that I want to cherish. But I am usually feeding/holding/changing Jack. Or cooking or cleaning or unpacking or starting/switching/sorting/folding laundry. Or praying that for five minutes--just FIVE minutes--Jack doesn't realize that I am not sitting behind him as he watches "doooooooog" or "choo choo" so I can PEE in PEACE. That is always a prayer God answers with a resounding "No." Which I guess is proof at least that God answers prayer.
So...life has been exceedingly hectic but is starting to get back to normal. Maybe. *We moved out of my father-in-law's house and into a rental in west Lancaster. Now we're on the opposite side of the planet from all of our friends, but exceptionally close to most of our family. My mother-in-law is only a couple miles away and my parents are a little over half a mile. But Littlerock High School is now a 50-mile round-trip, so I will try to sub in Lancaster more often.
*One of my sisters moved to UCSD, which I might expand on later.
*My youngest sister is about to start school again and her FIRST JOB! Woot!
*I'm applying for a handful of jobs at AVC (Oh, I lust after good benefits. Oh, and more money.).
*Jack is talking and copying everything we say. Even the less agreeable words that occasionally slip out. He is also gigantic and is in 2T clothes now and size 5 diapers. Ugh. He is soooo big! And handsome. And perfect.
It is wonderful at night when Jack falls asleep in my arms, "beet-ah" (binky) in his mouth and I can imagine that he is still a baby, still sweetly curled in my arms, even if the legs and arms hang off the edges a bit more than ever. I love the completely surrendered state of sleep he often slips into when he hasn't had a nap during the day. His binky slips out of his mouth and I could probably juggle him and he wouldn't wake up.
I think a lot about how I'm going to handle him getting old enough that he won't let me cuddle him. Am I really going to get to a stage when I'm okay with not covering his face with kisses or ache for him to hold my hand with his little fingers? It's absolutely bizarre to me.
I also think a lot about how much work being a mom is, having ONE is...and then the thought will cross my mind, maybe I'll just have one. Then this overwhelming sense of responsibility washes over me that I need to give Jack a brother or sister. That he needs a playmate, a friend, someone to fight with and play with and love and hate. Someone other than me, I mean. And then I think about how I miss getting pregnant (hey, I can't lie), being pregnant and even wearing preggo pants again and going through labor, as painful as that can be. And how I will treasure a new one so much more even than Jack, since I mostly know what to expect and can delight in his/her differences rather than jump in panic everytime they squeak, squeal or cry. So I think we'll have another one. Not now, not for awhile, but we do want about three. I think.
Sorry for all the disjointed-ness in this post. I'm always a little rusty whenever I plop myself down here to actually write something.
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